T O P

Writing stuff for a living

Writing stuff for a living

rMemesMods

**You need to read following message in full. We will NOT reply to modmail messages similar to “what is reason my post was removed?”** Hey /u/Timely-Entertainer38, thanks for contributing to /r/memes. Unfortunately, your post was removed as it violates our rules: Rule 9 - No forced memes, overused memes, bad titles, or pushing agendas * No forced memes, [overused memes](https://www.reddit.com/r/memes/wiki/overused), bad titles, or pushing agendas. Be creative but memes must come naturally. No petitions. * **Mods may remove low quality posts at their discretion, including reaction memes** --- Please read the sidebar before posting again. If you have questions or concerns, please [message the moderators through modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/memes&subject=&message=). Thank you!


Lost_Patrol

Math done poorly by people with non math degrees, for people even worse at math


Timely-Entertainer38

You want some meth?


Tommysrx

Methmatician ?


Pristine-Confection7

Software engineer


derpykidgamer

My thoughts exactly


kaeliebug

Accountant


TheOssified

Engineer? pi = 3 go brrr


Windhaen

Research statistician?


Roundcouchcorner

H&R Block ?


LCPretzelCrust

Tutor?


huckleberry_19

Teacher


TheInsanitizer

Cashier


memcool

I go through dead people organs to look at how they die


XzeldafanX

McDonalds macot


AightlmmaHead0ut

Hol up


Dannycar01

Otopsy person however u spell that


Cap_Chaser

Autopsy


Dannycar01

No that’s what mechanics do


Tommysrx

Awwtopsy


acole25

Pathologist, medical examiner, coroner?


Big_Bad_Chongus

Lose sanity for 0$ a month


Timely-Entertainer38

A student


Big_Bad_Chongus

We have a winner


planegod420

Well a student should be losing sanity for -30000 per year


KLGamer7084

r/depressedupvotes


Profezzz

Lucky bastard I actually pay a lot of money to lose mine


[deleted]

Preach


Worldly-Phone113

I stab people, steal their blood and inject them with chemicals Nurse


Emettex

Barber


Worldly-Phone113

No. You must have had some pretty traumatic hair cuts.


Emettex

Barbers were more or less, surgeons back in ye olde times. They would be the ones to do bloodletting on other people.


Practical-Cow-4074

That is why barber poles are striped red and white, to signify bloody bandages. Good old barber-surgeons.


djemmssy

Mosquito man ?


SKULCRUSHR_

ER guy??


Worldly-Phone113

Close enough. Nurse


dopedudefromthealps

I didn’t know mosquito’s could use reddit


Careless_Fox9909

Nurse/phlebotomist it sounds like


baniidapateuspike

Some guys under the birdge in my town do that


SomebodysVincent

I sell fermented juice.


DrP0t

Bartender?


Lucardic

belle delphine


Brodo-Flaggins

Jesus. What a chad over here. I don’t have the award to give you, but I would.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Irvxing

Touching old people


Timely-Entertainer38

holup


Irvxing

Not like that. I'm a escort ya pervs.


[deleted]

[удалено]


not_suspicious-_-

oh no


[deleted]

[удалено]


Logando34

Its when you take someome from point A to point B when they cant get there themselves


Illustrious_Zone_154

r/holup


Mr-Stud-Muffin

You won


Arch_Stanton1862

Uses foot to transport people.


Timely-Entertainer38

Rickshaw guy


Arch_Stanton1862

Close but not correct


CrocodylFr

Stretcher bearer ?


Arch_Stanton1862

So close.


Ingenious_crab

what is it??


devan_007

Maybe an earthbender moving a train in Ba Sing Se?


Fantasic0072striker

Actually that makes sense


Arch_Stanton1862

I kick people! I kick people as hard and as long as I can with every ounce of strength in my body until they are on their desired location.


cheese_tazer69

Bang my female coworkers


Not-An-Actual-Hooman

Activision worker


MIZARD924

Daymm take my award


Lets-burn-the-witch

A catholic priest… oh wait female coworkers not young alter boys.


bagel-42

Drummer


BenBMTH

I make sure that the stuff the business want to happen… happen


corinalas

Lawyer.


Endlessfour

Mob enforcer?


vikster1

Congressman


BenBMTH

Nope


Tommysrx

Senator ?


Tanya00000

Guns go brrrr


Timely-Entertainer38

American student


Tanya00000

Naah


odx3

yeeah


Illustrious_Zone_154

thank you for your service furries don't kill themself


XzeldafanX

Very tr- what


EngineeringAlt

Yes they do.


quarterpounder420

Military or police.


xisic

Distribute and deal a controlled, highly addictive substance to civilians Edit: I am a Barista


Il-Duce-

Pharmacist or Fast Food Worker?


TiredAndOutOfIdeas

you work in a tavern or something?


EngineersAnon

Since when is caffeine "controlled"? [\*drinks tea\*]


Speedwagon_Enjoyer

war crimes


Milkkolaj

North Korean president assistant


YourAverageMemeRater

I call people cringe and unfunny if their meme suck


Timely-Entertainer38

Username checks out


Fish_protector69

redditor ?


[deleted]

I do questionable stuff with dead people


Doom_Slayer_2712

Logan Paul?


bromigo_dorito

grave 'robber' ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


nsbdjslxnwkxm

I magically turn human poop and piss into clean water


cruellacpa

Thank you


Z_one_S

Supporting dumb people who break their pcs and complain on the phone


Phgraph

“Have you turned it off and on again?” (Checks in person) “It’s not even plugged in!”


bromigo_dorito

IT specialist?


Th3_Gaiaphag3

I am confined for approximately 7 hours a day, and when I go home, I have to work from home as well. I hive my salary to my parents. My salary is approximately -$1000 HKD.


Thatonesheepcow

Student?


SilentWolf84

I touch people’s food and give them the six inches they want. (Or the footling if they’re feeling ambitious)


Phgraph

Subway sandwich artist


SilentWolf84

Yes


olpossumboy

I heat animals and plants so people can stick them in their faces


Raichu047

With lamb sauce I hope


SquidDayGames

What the fuxk


GForce1410

Chef


Tommysrx

The ozone layer ?


PinballWizard_740

I argue with old people about numbers and play with a conveyor belt.


Phgraph

Cashier


bromigo_dorito

store clerk or a pharmacist?


Dr_Fudge

I tell people how not to die when they're working and none of them ever listen


cruellacpa

OSHA?


AlkaliAvocado

HSE?


sumbruro

Has to be


ShadowBlade8192

I'm 'between jobs'


easyadventurer

I too am a freelance entrepreneur between windfalls…


The_Maqueovelic

I get called on the phone to sort out the problems of 2 or more people who can't talk to each other without me


cruellacpa

Mom?


The_Maqueovelic

Go to your room


PoolMermaid

I teach adults how to make children wet Edit: I teach people to be swimming instructors.


Milkkolaj

WTF


PoolMermaid

…Swimming lessons lol


Madmax11b

I take people who have psychotic mental illnesses out of jail and psych wards and give them somewhere to live amongst the community, completely free to come and go


nellstachio

I, too, get to hang out with the homeless and criminally insane. The bingo games are a riot. Best job I've ever had.


BionicKronic67

I place wet, muddy rocks on the ground and mold them into shape and watch it dry for several hours. Also smoke lots of ciggy butts while I wait.


biggych33se

Where I go getting shot is normal


Dependent-Pumpkin971

You work at a clinic/hospital


Lets-burn-the-witch

US school teacher?


supersoft-tire

Living in Detroit isn’t a job


c3rowa5h3r3

I argue professionally.


Dependent-Pumpkin971

Lawyer


c3rowa5h3r3

You're correct.


Arufer720

I'm an "inator" inator


flabbergastedon2610

Legal thief


mildmadnerd

Politician?


UC767

I prevent people from sleeping and if needed give them a cocaine substitute


Ihomaph

Indirect American consumerism


rapidWindmuehle26

I work with fire and glass.


DaNoahLP

Turning PCs off and on again


Endlessfour

You’re a power button?


Milkkolaj

It worker?


misterjip

Doing stuff and getting paid for it


Lets-burn-the-witch

Prostitution


misterjip

Basically. But without the sex.


_throwawaynamaste

I put stuff in tubes


ShriKaav

I play with electricity and blow bubbles in the water at the same time


Hokusai135

I tell people to tell me things, then I ask them things about the things they tell me, then they tell themselves new things. New things sometimes are better than old things.


devan_007

Provides tonics and elixirs to those who want to escape reality...


Prudent-Way7011

I scream racial slurs at nine year olds


Milkkolaj

Streamer


Prudent-Way7011

Gamer


SophMore_

Internally screaming at a digital sheet of paper


Oostengeld

Food taxi


GuiltyOstrich4755

I give people wood


cruellacpa

Eva Green?


GuiltyOstrich4755

No


LPWMemz

People come to me when they’re sad or happy and ask me to poison their liver.


mildmadnerd

Hey bartender


-2spooky4u-

Listen to insane person for hour. Money


NemoFawkes804

I tell people their cars aren’t worth as much as they might think they do


[deleted]

[удалено]


Milkkolaj

priest


_wh4t3v3r_

Hahahaha


Zubert1990

Get sworn at, hit, and spit on all day while calmly working through story problems involving a guy buying 63 watermelons.


Knight_Destiny

Accepting calls of mostly idiots who can't turn on their tv.


Ghostofshadess

Jeff bezos slave


JaydenMemeGod

I get traped in a prison being forced to work for 6 hours and then still get work when they relaese me


Bonobal

I manage 35 apes and try to make them learn about their ancestor


Tiddiebang

Drive to take money


EggyTheWise

I read the instructions for people too lazy to do it themselves #tech support


TheTealKingOfDragons

I hit a red pipe, I yell, I get yelled at, I read over simplified instructions, do them then get told I did them wrong.


praharpatelpl

Baby sit stupid middle aged man children all day


PotatoRear

I enforce a creature to do my work by giving the a list of things to do, and if they fail to do it, I bang my head against the wall


Kiwi_dll

I stare at my computer screen every day trying to figure out what I did wrong.


EUCrime_Junkie

I listen to people and make them cry


CornNutMasticator

Emotional Prostitute


Risk_Visible

I offer services that people hate on because of it's community


Anonymouslnnit

I make sandwiches for people that may or may not ask for a manager Tis a true gamble of luck


S8TJR90

old people yell at me while i say things that they dont like


Microwaved-banana21

I answer stupid peoples questions


Praeradio_Yenearsira

Make skyboat not fall


Drizzling_Mike

17


Alksi_

Sailing for a living


Alksi_

How do you explane this job badly


Suprizer

"i hop into a tin can across the seas and pray it doesn't sink while i am init"


Alksi_

Yeah that works I'm just dumb


cruellacpa

You spend days wandering a wet desert aimlessly


Emettex

I perform a series of rituals, that are incompatible with my mind, for over 12 years.


Ok_Cry1424

Getting roasted for hours for not writing 40 pages of useless stuff in 2 days


dondisease

I tear apart and put back together things which people find to be a necessity in life so that they may continue to perform tasks in a quick fashion


mildmadnerd

Mechanic?


TheInternetCritic

0 divided by anything


yourjustbetter

Look at screen and press buttons all day


DrBraniac

Getting to know stuff then forgetting it and then trying to remember it all in one night for writing stuff on a paper which will be judged by people who gave me that knowledge


starredkiller108

Learning from people's mistakes.